hope is diminishing day by day.
have you ever gotten yourself into something and thoroughly enjoyed the process, but hated the people you had to put up with during it? i am going through one of these processes and as much as i enjoy it, i don't like some of the people involved and i want to leave! but i don't know how. because i feel some form of responsibility. i offered to be responsible, and i should be responsible. but nobody seems to care so why should i still feel responsible? why's it in my nature? i should listen to her.
i am dreading the day when i have to face reality that i was living in some sort of (what i thought was an) impenetrable bubble. i already know it.. just waiting for this bubble to burst. in the past few months, i've learnt things which have made me regret so many of my actions in the past three years.... REALLY. i'm quite daft. i know what i'm doing isn't what i should do but i still do it anyway.
i think i'm too timid. not assertive enough. a pushover. boring. wallflower-type person. sometimes i envy you for being all that i am not -- but then again, it's pitiful how you get along with the entire world but behind your back people don't quite like you at all. sigh.
wish i could find a way to make u understand. -shrug-
working sucks. when u see people u know and u gotta serve them.
it sucks to serve juniors in dressy duds who pay with credit cards. it makes me feel lousy. :(
blahhhhhhhhhh. :( :(
posted by hazie @ 5:17:00 pm
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