hazie at wettyblanket.blogspot.com

questions without answers?

been thinking about my future - not school future, but love&family kind.

i've always wanted to have a laogong who is capable, not-rich-but-still-well-to-do kind.. the kind of relationship where i can work part-time and have kids and still have enough money to afford lovely things like a gorgeous sofa, mini trips abroad, a nice MPV.

i know now tt tt 'dream' will probably nvr come. am i getting to personal? i'm 'trapped' in a rltionship i dun mind being trapped in. haha. but still a part of me longs to find that capable person who can assure me a life of not-so-hard-work. (pardon me, i dunno why i cannot construct proper sentences even tho i got 11 hours of beauty sleep.)

i dont want to have too many money problems. too stressful. i want to have kids and have enough time to deal with the kids. i dont want to work full time and come home at night, too drained from work to still have that creative and alert mind necessary for the proper nurturing of my kids. u know?

so many things to thnk of.. but even aft thinking, even when u know what u wish to chge, doesnt mean u will/can chge it. after all, i feel responsible for your welfare, for you. i cannot dump "love-with-less-monetary-security" for "more-monetary=security-with-less-love".. funny thing is tt both love n money can js disappear like, with a snap of my fat fingers.

and believe it or not.. i dont really care about looks. even the ugliest of things can grow on me.. even hairy moles can be endearing, like a 6th finger, furry toes, smelly pits, face full of pimples.. all becomes endearing when the person who has them becomes important to you..

posted by hazie @ 2:21:00 pm