hazie at wettyblanket.blogspot.com

what should i title this?

sometimes i get angry with myself. i can't be like other girls - revealing what i have for all to see. behaving as if whatever little physical assets i have are public, not private, and having fun without considering others around me.
i can't dress skimpy and go on public transport without a whole lotta thinking. i get easily flustered when i see other people's bfs looking at other skimpily-clad girls when their gfs are just sitting beside them. it's supposed to be normal and all, but i can't help getting affected by it. i can't be like katharine mcphee. i can't laugh and bend over and let loose if i wear a lowcut halter top. i can't wear a lowcut halter top. it's just.. not right, u know? i don't want the whole world seeing my 'lovely laydee lumps'. even if the rest of the world does it, i dunno why, but i just can't. i'm very tired of seeing panties on mrt trains. why do i get all the 'luck'?

why do girls reveal stuff and then blame the men for being perverted when they are the ones who drive these men to perversion? if you don't want these men treating your assets as cheap, free, playthings.. then treasuring them starts with you. if you treat things preciously, people will treat your things preciously when they know it's precious to you. use your brains. monkey see, monkey do. is it really all that great to be 'wild'? what do u get out of it?

and something else - girls wonder why their bfs don't stay with them. there is so much to explain on that. so much i can't put properly into words. is there such a thing as thinking without words? i have been doing a lot of that. a lot of pictures, a lot of feelings, a lot of sound without words, songs without lyrics.

the phrase 'if you can't beat them, join them' has stayed in my head since i was in primary 3 and read my 156846455th archie comic. somehow i've never been able to put that into action.

posted by hazie @ 1:17:00 pm